


AdventDrabbles 2008

by lilyseyes



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Implied Mpreg, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-17
Updated: 2015-06-17
Packaged: 2018-04-04 19:24:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,053
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4149867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lilyseyes/pseuds/lilyseyes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for the adventdrabbles 2008 comm on insanejournal, this is a series of 25 drabbles reliving memories of Severus' early holidays with his friend Lily.</p>
<p> Warning: implied child abuse - Severus is 10 in these memories.</p>
            </blockquote>





	AdventDrabbles 2008

Scrooge:

The small boy opened the door to his bedroom silently, gingerly poking his head out. The flickering light from the hearth lit the scowling face of the man leaning against the mantle, drinking scotch. Severus' father was still wearing the dreary brown suit that his mother stayed up late nights to clean and press for him.

Mummy wouldn't be doing that tonight, ordered as Severus had to bed without supper for mentioning Father Christmas. It'd been Severus' fault, really, for asking who that was. 

Severus was glad he hadn't asked who the evil Scrooge was, but perhaps he already knew.

Sharing:

It was trying to snow, a drop of sleet running down his back as Severus waited for Lily. Severus wished he had a wand of his own; he'd be able to make their hiding spot under the slide warm and dry with magic, like his mum used when his father wasn't around. 

"Happy Christmas, Severus!" Lily called as she pushed through the brush that guarded the entrance, juggling brightly colored packages. "I'm sorry I'm late! I almost didn't get away from Tuney!"

Severus scowled as his friend shoved the gifts into his hands, her green eyes glowing with excitement. He could only stare at them, the silence stretching uncomfortably. Hearing a harsh breath, Severus looked up to see in the narrowed eyes and thin-lipped expression that he'd hesitated too long.

"Don't you dare try to refuse those presents, Severus Snape!" 

A magical breeze ruffled the fiery hair as Severus watched in awe.

"My mum and I made those for you with our own hands, because you are my friend, and you are going to take them or so help me…"

Severus didn't let his friend finish, tearing open the closest present. If the edges of the green and black scarf were a bit uneven or the mittens a little tight, Severus never noticed, as he munched happily on the chocolate biscuits that he now possessed an entire tin of. Lily had shared with him descriptions of her Christmas, giving him his only presents, and renewing the gift of her friendship.

Magical Rides:

"…and we got to ride in a real sleigh, Severus!" 

Lily danced around him as Severus brushed the snow off the both swings with his mitten-clad hands. Her fiery hair and jewel-bright eyes were splashes of color amid the drifting snowflakes. She bumped shoulders with him.

"I wish you could have gone with us, Severus, you'd have loved London!" 

Severus brushed hard at the swing, scowling. He scrambled to think of something that would impress his friend as much as stupid Muggle sleigh rides. 

"We'll have many carriage and sleigh rides, magical ones," he emphasized, "at Hogwarts."

Lily's eyes lit with awe at the mention of magic and she slid into the swing next to him, her focus completely on him. A smile curved his lips and a warm feeling settled in his chest. Lily was the only friend Severus ever had and he would do anything to keep her.

Accidental Magic:

Severus lay in the darkness, unable to sleep for the throbbing along the backs of his legs and arse. He'd stayed too long at the playground with Lily, not finishing his chores. His father hadn't been pleased, but what infuriated him, was that halfway through his 'lesson' on discipline, his belt suddenly became as soft as a satin ribbon. 

Smiling, Severus reached under his bed, reassured by the weight of the snow globe Lily had given him. A quick shake set a blizzard raging inside, covering the tiny castle. 

Next Christmas, he and Lily would be at Hogwarts.

A Magical Afternoon:

Severus' heart swelled with pride as he watched his mum levitate a tea tray in to the small garden behind their home, warming charms making it suitable for tea. A dreary place in the summer where Eileen Snape struggled to grow vegetables, it was a winter wonderland this afternoon. Icicles glittered like jewels as the sun caught them and the snow was thick and fluffy, thanks to the rarely seen wand in his mother's hand. 

With his father out of town, Severus had finally brought Lily to meet his mum, who wore her best robes. Lily was warm and gracious, charming Severus' mum as she had the son. Awestruck at the display of magic, Lily's curiosity about the charms and spells had been enthusiastic, peppering his mum with questions.

For Severus, the hug Lily gave him when he walked her home made this the most magical afternoon of his life. 

Slytherin Cunning:

Severus' father was in a jovial mood when he came home from work that night and Severus was immediately suspicious. Niceness was usually the sign of a drink or two, but Severus knew only a few more would turn the man into a monster. His mother had made hot spiced cider for tea and seemed surprised when his father had asked for one.

Severus was smarter; he knew what was in the small flask peeking out of the suit jacket hanging on the chair. When his father excused himself to wash-up, Severus grabbed the flask, dumping part into the sink and refilling it with the tasteless sleeping potion his mother had taught him to brew that afternoon. He was back in his seat before his father returned, knowing the hot toddy would taste of alcohol, but tonight the beast would sleep. 

Severus and his mum would have a peaceful evening.

All Will Be Bright:

"Silent night, holy night, all is calm…"

Severus could hear the off-key but enthusiastic voices of carolers as they walked down the street. The gently falling snow muffled the sound. Lily said her mum gave all the singers hot chocolate and cookies to thank them for coming out and singing.

Severus' father turned out the lights instead, making him go to his room. Mum said the carolers were a tradition from the old ways, when witches and wizards celebrated the Solstice and the Yule traditions. 

Someday, Severus vowed in the silence of the night, he'd make his own Yule traditions! 

Yule Wreath:

Severus stepped back, admired his handiwork that hung as straight as he could manage on the front door. The wreath was formed by thin evergreen branches wrapped in ivy, small pine cones, red holly berries, and white mistletoe berries decorating the prickly holly leaves. Lily researched traditional Yule wreaths and they'd made one for each of their mothers. 

"Oh, Severus! It's beautiful!" 

His mum blinked her eyes suspiciously as she hugged him right there in front of the neighborhood, but Severus found he wasn't too bothered by it. Nor was he bothered by the Notice-Me-Not spell she cast on it.

Magi Gifts:

Severus eyed the small red and white stocking in Lily's hand with a feeling of trepidation. They had great fun making the wreaths for their mums as Yule gifts, but Severus wasn't sure about taking the Christmas stocking Lily held out. He had nothing to give her in return.

"But…" Severus squirmed, embarrassment heating his cheeks.

Lily narrowed her brilliant eyes at him. "Severus Snape! The origin of the Christmas stocking came from medieval times when Saint Nicholas left gold a-non-y-mous-ly in the stockings three sisters had left to dry on the fireplace. I can't leave this for you like that, so just take it!"

Severus grabbed the stocking Lily thrust at him hard, her arms crossing over her chest in a gesture he was very familiar with. Severus used his feet to rock himself back and forth on the swing, Lily watching with a glare as he peered inside. Sweets. The stocking was filled with boiled sweets and Mars Bars, Severus' favorites.

"Thank you, Lily, but…" 

Severus started to mumble, but Lily cut him off, stepping close to put a hand on his arm.

"Haven't you learned yet, Sev, that this is the season to give, not the season to see how much you can get back. You've given me the gift of your friendship and shared with me the wonderful world of magic. That's certainly gift enough for me."

Severus had no words and could only offer Lily a lemon sherbert to cover the tightness in his throat. 

Christmas Magic:

"Santa Claus is just a Muggle myth!" Severus snorted, a smirk twisting his lips.

Lily studied his face with knowing eyes. "Haven't you ever received any gifts on Christmas morning, Severus? Even something small and unexpected on your pillow?" 

Severus frowned at his friend's soft voice; it was the one she used when she'd guessed all the nasty, embarrassing secret things about him that he never told her. She knew his parents didn't celebrate Christmas, but she couldn't know that his father didn't believe in gifts or the holidays, thinking it was all a frivolous waste of money. Yet, every Christmas morning, there was a small wrapped box at the foot of his bed and it was always something magical. The small pewter cauldron hidden in his closet was his favorite. Severus always thought that his mum…

Meeting his friend's brilliant eyes, Severus managed a crooked smile. "I guess you are right, Lily, Father Christmas is magical."

Lily laughed, low and sweet, as she smacked his arm. "That's exactly what I said, you prat! And when I grow-up and have children, no matter how little we have, my children will know Muggle and magical traditions and Father Christmas will always remember them!" 

Severus smiled as he watched his friend talk, her eyes gleaming, fiery hair swirling around her as Lily swayed on her swing. Her energy flowed over him and warmed him as Severus silently agreed. He'd never, ever, be a bullying bastard like his father when he grew up. 

Fairytale Wizard:

Severus walked beside his mother through Muggle London, looking with wide eyes into the decorated windows of the stores. They were going to Diagon Alley, to sell the potions he'd helped her brew that morning. Mum had promised they would buy Lily a present with the money they'd earned. Severus was torn between a wizarding book and Honeydukes' chocolates – he'd never bought a present before!

"Oh, Severus! Look!"

Looking, Severus jumped back as he came face to face with a toy wooden soldier, who was as tall as Severus, possessing a fearsome set of teeth. He glanced at his mother with a questioning look.

"It's a decoration from a ballet," she chided him gently, "based on a Russian fairytale written by a wizard named Tolsty…" 

Special Friend:

Severus swayed on the swing, watching his breath as it puffed out in clouds of steam. It was really cold today; maybe Lily had decided not to come. A crunching sound brought his head up and Severus' heart squeezed as he saw his friend trudging over the frozen ground. His always cheerful Lily walked with her shoulders hunched and hands jammed into her pockets. Even her vibrant hair seemed dull and lank. 

"Lily? What's wrong?" Severus watched as she sat in the swing next to him.

"Petunia went ice skating with her friends today, but she made me stay in my room until they left," Lily told him quietly. "She said she didn't want them to know her sister was a freak."

"Your sister always calls me a freak," Severus snapped, unable to keep the contempt from his voice.

Lily winced, her eyes sad. "I thought she was just jealous that you were my friend, Severus, but it's our magic – she thinks it's unnatural."

Severus nodded, Lily's sister was a vile, ugly Muggle, but he'd tolerated her for Lily' sake. "My father hates magic, too. He gets really angry if he thinks Mum is using magic at all and detests that I turned out a wizard."

"But to hate us just because we've been gifted with something they aren't, isn't right!" 

"They're just ignorant, Lils," Severus reached over to awkwardly pat her hand. "Magic is what makes us special. You'll see, once we get to Hogwarts, how brilliant magic is!"

Magical Storm:

Severus stared at the flickering candles that floated about the room with awe, the sight of his mum with her wand in hand exhilarating. The winds buffeting against the windows sent a swirling blast down the chimney, scattering sparks across the hearth.

"Your father rang from London, Severus. Apparently the storm is too fearsome for him to attempt the drive. We've been left to our own devices; therefore, we will be doing things the Prince way this evening."

Grinning, Severus helped his mother with dinner, thrilled by the spell that had the dishes cleaning themselves. Afterwards, he sat on the settee where they went over his lessons and Severus knew he'd done well.

"Excellent, my son," His mother gave him a smile with her praise. "Would you like to hold my wand?"

Nodding eagerly, Severus held his hand out, not breathing as the length of wood was set on his palm. Carefully closing his hand, Severus could feel the magic like a living force in wood caress his skin. Green and silver sparks shot out the end, startling him, his mum holding tightly to his shoulder.

"Say Lumos."

"Lumos!" Severus repeated, gasping when the wand-tip flare to light.

"And put it out – you know the word, son."

Taking a breath, Severus let it out slowly. "Nox!"

His mum gave him a rare hug. "Well done, Severus!"

He was sure his cheeks glowed in the candle light, but Severus could feel his chest puff out proudly. He'd just done his first real magic.

A Much Maligned Church:

Severus stared at the thick piece of cake Lily handed him and weighed it thoughtfully in his hand. It was heavier than he expected, not that Severus had ever had much opportunity to eat cake, and he held it up to his nose. The aroma was rich with spices, honey, and ginger along with something dark and fermented. Candied fruit, raisins, and nuts jammed the spongy cage, giving it the weight Severus felt. His mouth watered in anticipation.

"…and I know that everyone says they're awful, Severus, but this one isn't like that, really. My mum makes the cake herself, even though it takes two days to do it and it is really, really good…"

Lily stood beside him, her lovely eyes beseeching him to take a bite. Severus almost laughed, but instead nodded bravely and took a cautious bite. The flavors exploded on his tongue, and Severus almost groaned with pleasure. His friend wrung her hands, mistaking his reaction for disgust. 

"I'm sorry, Severus, I just thought…"

Severus held up his hand, taking another bite and relishing the wonderful taste as he chewed slowly. Lily watched him, teeth worrying her lip as he ate it all. Severus decided that licking his fingers might give him away.

"There, now you can tell your mum that I ate every bite of her much maligned treat," Severus said, brushing the crumbs off his hands. "And thought it was brilliant."

Lily's smile lit her face, and Severus felt warmth spread through his chest. 

Christmas Future:

Severus trudged through the cold, damp street, his shoulders hunched in the thin jacket he wore. His mum had sent him to the store with a cuff to the head that morning, her face averted. Mum didn't like questions the morning after a row with his father, especially as spectacular as the one last night. Did they really expect him to sleep through the drunken yelling, the sounds of things breaking, or his mother's muffled sobs?

"Chestnuts roasting on an open fire Jack Frost nipping at your nose…" 

Sneering, Severus veered around the singing Muggle and continued. He didn't have anything to sing about and his father's belief that it was all a ploy to get an honest man's hard earned money meant Severus never would. Next year, he and Lily had vowed that they would spend Christmas together at Hogwarts, away from her foul sister and Severus would have everything he didn't at home. There they could sit in their common room, enjoying hot chocolate and all sorts of tasty treats, without any conflict or unpleasantness. 

"Everybody knows a turkey and some mistletoe help to make the season bright…"

A smile curved Severus' lips. He knew his happiness was tied to Lily – she was the key to how his life would turn out and Severus would cling to that to get him through until they left for Hogwarts. 

Then, the plans Severus had to become rich and powerful would begin, and Lily would be a big part of those.

Christmas Past:

Severus polished the mantel with lemon oil until it gleamed, listening to his mum hum Christmas songs as she moved around the kitchen. Rubbing the rag over the dark wood, he warmed himself on the small fire burning in the hearth as he moved to the front. Severus could feel three small holes spaced evenly along the wood facing. Lily had told him about how she and her foul excuse for a sister hung stockings on their mantel Christmas Eve, knowing they would be filled with sweets in the morning. 

Slowly Severus rubbed his fingers over the indentations, his mind drifting to images of three children living in the house long ago, when everything was new and bright. Happy laughter rang through the room as they played games in front of the fireplace. A tall, gaily decorated tree in the corner, surrounded by gifts wrapped in bright colored paper, and three large stocking hanging from the mantel waiting to be filled. The room would fill with relatives, all waiting for dinner to be brought out, as the roasting turkey filled the house with its fragrant aroma.

"Severus! Don't dawdle, boy! Your father will be home anytime now!"

His mother's voice yanked him back to reality and Severus hurried to finish his chores. Someday, he thought, with a vicious swipe of the rag, his family would celebrate Christmas or Yule the way it used to be – laughter and love filling the house with warmth and his children eagerly awaiting Father Christmas. 

Worth the Risk:

Severus shivered, pulling his thin coat tighter around him as the chill seeped in. He'd picked the coldest night of the year to douse his father's drink with Dreamless Sleep potion and sneak out. The sound of voices raised in song drew him towards the next corner and Severus crept close to the row of houses as he approached the group of carolers. His eyes searched the singers for the fiery auburn hair of his friend.

"It came upon a midnight clear, that glorious song of old…"

Severus caught sight of Lily, her hair mostly covered by a green hat and the collar of her tan coat. She sang like she did most things, with a sparkle to her eyes and a smile on her face. Severus found he didn't mind the cold anymore as he watched, or the threat of his father's extreme displeasure if he was discovered gone. He'd take the chance, as Lily sang in a clear, sweet voice that Severus could listen to for hours.

"Good King Wenceslas looked out on the feast of Stephen. When the snow lay round about, deep and crisp and even…"

Severus sang along quietly to one of the few songs his mother had taught him for the Yule celebration.

"Severus!" 

Lily was beside him, her pleasure at seeing him fading into a frown as she realized what he'd done. "Oh, Severus, you've got to go home! I don't want you…hurt because of me!" 

Severus felt it was worth the risk.

Ramifications:

Severus allowed his nose to guide his footsteps to the kitchen, shoving his frozen fingers into his pockets. A smirk erupted as Severus remembered exactly why his father was having a lie-in that morning, but he quickly hid it. His mother had given him a hard look when he's gotten up, before sending Severus out to the garden with a lengthy list of chores.

"What smells so good?" Severus asked quietly from the doorway, shifting from foot to foot, unsure of his welcome.

His mum glanced up at him from the batter she was stirring. "Plum pudding," she told him in a clipped voice. "It's your father's favorite and I thought it might sweeten his disposition when he gets up."

Severus watched as she reached for a bottle of brandy, carefully measure a small amount into the bowl. Watching her chop and stirred reminded him of the potions they brewed when his father was away, her hands moving in with sure efficiency.

"And Severus, if you ever decide to sneak out of this house, make sure it's for a very good reason as you are not the only one who might suffer for your misbehavior."

Swallowing against the dryness in his throat, Severus stepped closer as his eyes searched for telltale bruises and marks. His mum met his eyes steadily and Severus dropped his first, realizing suddenly that he wasn't clever as he thought he was.

"Also, make sure your dosage is correct, so I don't have to re-dose him."

Gifts and Kittens:

Severus hurried toward the swings, his mitten-clad hands holding Lily's present securely under his coat. His mum had given him a piece of parchment to wrap it and Severus had done his best at it. His fingers gripped the edges of the book as Severus tripped over something and was startled when he heard a hissing sound. Jumping back, he whipped around trying to find the source. 

"Severus! Are you all right?" Lily came running towards him, before stopping short. "Oh, look!"

Looking down, Severus saw a tiny black kitten, it's back arched and fur standing on end, it appeared ready to pounce on his foot. Lily clapped her hands in delight as Severus crouched down. Cautiously, he held his hand out towards the quivering little creature, scooping it up with one hand as it came to him. 

"Oh how sweet! Look, Sev, his eyes are green like mine!"

The kitten blinked up at them warily and Severus could see the emerald eyes watch him as he cradled the trembling ball of fur. The carefully wrapped present fell from his jacket and hit the wet ground. It leapt into Lily's hand as if Summoned and Severus smiled as his friend merrily opened her gift, his mittens warming the kitten. Chewing on his lip nervously, Severus sighed with relief when Lily squealed with delight over A Magical History of Magic.

"Severus," Lily gasped, her eyes glued to the book she'd just opened. "The pictures move!"

They poured over the book together in their secret place, the kitten purring against Severus' chest as he shared part of the sandwich Lily had brought him. Lily watched with sad eyes and Severus knew it was because her cow of a sister was allergic and she couldn't even pet the kitten. Severus refused to give his father another victim.

In the end, they found a small, broken basket, covering the bottom with sand from under the swings, and made a bed from Severus' mittens. Lily hugged her new book as they left, both of them looking back at the bright green eyes that watched them. 

Envy:

Severus watched as two boys his age ran ahead of their parents to his and Lily's swings, breath steaming in the cold air. Moving under the slide, Severus slipped into their secret place, the kitten tumbling out of his basket to greet him. Sinking down, Severus took out the kippers he'd slipped from his breakfast and absently fed them to the kitten as he watched the boys play. Their dad stood pushing the swings as their mum cheered from the small bench, pulling food out of a bag. Wrapped sweets and Christmas crackers spilled out, falling to the ground.

Severus thought back to what his mum had said that morning about Yule. He knew that it wasn't good to be prideful or arrogant, and knew that he wasn't a glutton or lazy as his mum saw to that. Severus thought that his father had enough wrath for all of them and he didn't think he knew what lust was yet, but he knew occasional he wanted more than he could have.

One of the boys jumped off the swing, running over to grab a cracker and pop it open. Severus watched, envy eating at him as the mother laughed. Envy was the one deadly sin that Severus knew he was guilty of as he took in the boy's warm jacket, new jeans, and sturdy shoes. The mother grabbed the boy, pulling him into a hug as the other boy and the father joined them. Everyone was laughing and eating, the kind of loving family that made Severus resentful and jealous.

Tomorrow was the solstice, the start of the Yule celebration, and a time for renewal, Severus reflected as he stroked the purring kitten. Severus vowed he would use the rebirth of the sun to start becoming a better person.

Memories:

Severus watched the strands of memory float around in the large stone Penseive, occasionally seeing a flash of auburn hair or the curve of his mum's cheek. It'd been a poignant journey as he relived his childhood memories with the one true friend he'd had growing up. Some of the half-forgotten images had made him smile, like the imp of a kitten who'd hung around until he and Lily left for Hogwarts. More emotionally distressing for Severus were the memories of his mother from that time, when she had taught him about magic and brewing. Before the toll of his father's indifferent brutality perpetuated her descent into self-medication by potion and alcohol to cope took her away from Severus.

Watching himself as a boy was difficult, child's eyes devouring the gingerbread houses and piles of sweets in the store at the holidays as envy and jealousy built up in his heart. Looking back, Severus could see how his resentment had grown slowly over the years, fueling his desire for wealth and power. How his actions had ultimately pushed his best friend away and set him on a path of self-destruction. In hindsight, Severus marveled at his naiveté and stupidity during a time when he was proud of his cleverness and cunning. He had been every bit as idiotic and arrogant as he'd accused Harry Potter of being over the years.

Now, as the headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Severus had accomplished what he'd craved from the time he was a small boy; power and respect. He'd been lauded as a hero, been given a metal, and revered for his intelligence and shrewdness. Best of all, Severus had finally found love, the kind of love that Lily had always told him was waiting for him, somewhere – the absolute, all-encompassing love of a soul-mate, in Lily's son.

Harry lifted his face from the shimmering liquid, his eyes suspiciously bright as Severus caught another flash of auburn hair. Deciding they'd viewed enough for today, Severus closed the Pensieve and opened his arms to the young man. Sharing his memories of Lily with Harry had been the best decision he'd ever made, albeit not an easy one.

"Severus? Could we make one of those gingerbread houses?"

Revisiting Love:

Severus stepped into his rooms with a sigh, his thoughts on the fine single malt scotch in his liquor cabinet. The Hogwarts Express had departed with the students on their way to blissful holidays of sweets, gifts, and parental coddling. Pouring himself two fingers of scotch, Severus spelled the fire higher, wondering where his errant lover had gone. 

A shimmer caught his eye as the silvery image of a stage burst through the wall, Harry's voice filling the room. 

"Severus, would you come to the garden, please?"

With a dramatic sigh, Severus set his glass down as the stag pranced around him before vanishing. Summoning his cloak, Severus headed towards the private garden they enjoyed during more temperate weather. Harry had been introspective since Severus had begun sharing the memories of his childhood holiday celebrations. They'd given Harry a view of his mum that no one else could, and Severus hoped, an insight into the development of his own character. Severus realized during the excruciating Occlumency lessons of Harry's fifth year that Petunia Evans had treated her nephew in a predictable manner, the filthy cow.

Stepping out the door, Severus stopped abruptly. The small garden had been transformed into a replica of his mother's from thirty years ago, down to the glistening icicles and floating tea tray. A trio of conjured reindeer, like Lily used to transfigure during their Hogwart's Christmases, chased each other through the snow. Harry stood silently, a small basket in his hands, those brilliant eyes watching Severus nervously. A small black head popped up, huge green eyes blinking at him even as Severus felt his heart expand two sizes.

"We could call him 'Imp'."

Severus could only enfold both imps in his arms, kissing Harry with desperate, unspoken emotion, as the kitten sniffed at his fingers.

Treasures:

Severus had discovered during the past months that Harry liked to snuggle. He'd also discovered that he couldn't object to the sensual feeling of warm skin pressed against him or the way their limbs entwined; rather like being cocooned in love and magic. The soft purr coming from beside his head was new, and Severus gave in to the smile tugging at his lips. Harry's thoughtfulness was a gift in itself. 

The wind howled outside the window, and Severus knew without looking that the snow storm that had started last night had whipped itself into a blizzard. There'd been a wild storm the Christmas of their fourth year when Lily had first tried to convince Severus of his predilection for his own sex. They'd had a terrible row Christmas Eve as Severus had thought himself so in love with his best friend; obsessively, he knew in hindsight. Envy had eaten at his heart despite his awakening sexuality, even after their apologies and, later, as he'd found solace in Regulus. Severus knew his obsession had been the start of his spiral into the Dark Lord's hands.

Harry shifted against him, morning erection sliding along his thigh. Severus smiled, tightening his arms around the second person in his life he'd given his heart to. He realized now that Lily had been right; she'd been his best friend in the way of Kipling's Thousandth Man, but not his soul mate. That had turned out to be her son, Harry. Somehow, Severus thought, Lily would be just fine with that.

Severus turned on his side, ignoring the protesting meow as he pulled Harry flush. His fingers slid into the soft, tousled hair, and Severus kissed his treasure as he aligned their pricks in a slow, delicious dance that was counter-point to the maelstrom outside. 

Cotton Candy Kisses:

Severus set aside his paperwork and stood, dislodging Imp from his lap. Moving to the window, Severus looked out over the Forbidden Forest, painted white under leaden skies. A small gathering below seemed to be engaged in an epic snowball battle around a rather pathetic looking snowman. A flash of emerald told him Harry was still tending to the small group of students staying at Hogwarts over the Christmas holidays. 

The memory of a lopsided snowman, tattered green scarf draped around it as Lily tried to fashion a face from a candy cane taken from their merger reserve of sweets. The result had been more of an oddly suggestive leer. It'd been a truly pathetic result, but the warmth in the brilliant eyes and his best friend's delighted laughter had thrilled Severus.

Watching the scene below, it took only an instant for Severus to decide decorum be damned and Summoned his cloak. The sound of laughter greeted him as Severus stepped outside, the brisk air invigorating. The sight of his lover, tousled hair frosted with white, cheeks flushed pink, and incredible eyes sparkling with happiness, stole his breath. Harry caught sight of him and a soul-stealing smile lit his face.

"Headmaster!"

A tiny Hufflepuff first-year ran towards him and for a horrific moment, Severus thought she was going to attempt to embrace him. Sliding to a stop in front of him, she peered up shyly.

"Did you come to play with us in the snow?"

Severus blinked at the eagerness in the small face, wondering what had happened to the fearsome persona he'd so carefully cultivated. 

"Mercifully not, Miss Dow, I chose merely to rescue you from your own lack of self-preservation." She looked at him blankly and Severus bit back a sigh. "There's hot cocoa and biscuits in the Great Hall, go warm up before you succumb to illness!"

With squeals of delight, all of the students ran for the door.

"Aren't they adorable, Severus?"

"Quite," Severus answered dryly, allowing Harry to press against him. "I do believe her fathers might have dropped her on her head in her infancy, however."

"Severus!" Harry admonished him as he chuckles. "Would you want someone to say that about a child of ours?"

The image of a green-eyed, raven-haired infant nestled against Severus' chest almost took him to his knees. Only Harry and his candy cane flavored kisses diverted his wild thoughts.

Joyful World:

The bedroom window enjoyed a sweeping view of the freshly fallen snow, the surface glistening in the first rays of moonlight. Severus took a sip of his scotch as he felt the sleek form of Imp weave between his feet, the beauty of the scene outside lost to him as his focus turned introspective. On this Christmas night, he reflected back on the prior ones he'd had in his forty years. Some were more like the nightmares he sometimes still suffered, but the happier ones seemed to push those quickly from his mind; the childhood ones with Lily and the more recent ones with Harry. 

The course of his life had changed dramatically the night of the Battle of Hogwarts, when a stubborn boy had refused to let him die, cold and alone, on the filthy floor of the Shrieking Shack. The same boy, having survived his own death and resurrection, stood tall in front of the entire Wizengamot, declaring Severus a hero and one of the bravest men he'd known. It was when Harry Potter escorted him back to the Headmaster's office that Severus realized somewhere along this journey they'd taken, Harry Potter had become a man. A forthright, intelligent, and rather attractive, young man who wanted to spend time with him and Severus found no reason to refuse. 

The day Harry had shyly brushed his lips across Severus' cheek, the earth had moved. It'd begun a slow, sensuous dance between them, culminating Christmas Eve two years ago. That was the night that Severus had been late getting back from his rounds, to find Harry, clad only in a red bow, waiting nervously in his bed. The love they'd made had been both sweet and explosive; they'd not slept apart since. Last Christmas Eve, Severus had shared with Harry his memories, good and bad, from the Christmases Severus had shared with Lily, wanting Harry to understand who Severus really was.

He stilled remembered the way his hands had trembled that afternoon as he stood next to a lopsided snowman and asked Harry to bond with him. The intensity of Harry's response had melted the icicles, and Severus, with his scorching kisses. They'd held a quiet ceremony a week later, welcoming the New Year as a married couple. Severus had felt an incredible sense of finally being at peace with his world as he'd slipped into Harry's tight heat. Harry had arched up to meet him, welcoming him with his body; Severus had been lost as they reasserted their love.

A soft mewing sound caught his attention and Severus couldn't stop the joy that surged through him. Harry had given him a precious gift this Christmas: a son. Setting his glass down, Severus carefully lifted the baby from his bassinet, cradling the tiny bundle against his chest as Harry stirred in their bed. 

"Severus?" His husband's voice was heavy with sleep.

"We are here, my heart," Severus settled next to Harry. "Where I will always be, right here beside you." 

 

~fin~


End file.
